Saving a marriage on the brink of divorce can seem like an impossible task. But it's not if you know how to stop divorce before it starts. Here are 4 helpful tips to save your marriage before it's too late.
1. Do more stuff together
Being with your partner is always better than being apart. But when you're on the brink of divorce, it's probably too late to start doing more things together. You need to have started before then, often well before.
Before your partner feels like you're the one pulling away in your marriage, schedule a weekly date night with your spouse where you take turns picking what you'll do each week.
And don't just go out for dinner and call it quits after that — do something active! Something where you can laugh together outside of work or daily stressors. It could be anything from playing tennis to learning a new craft together. The activity is less important than the time you spend together.
2. Fight for your marriage
If there's no fight in a relationship, it's because one or both partners have already given up. Being the one to give up is easy, but it's not healthy. Fight for your marriage with everything you have! Start by refusing to express any negative thoughts about your spouse or your relationship.
Stop bringing up “future talk” topics that might lead to a fight — things like where you'll live after you retire, how many kids you want, etc. And avoid discussing future hypotheticals entirely until both of you are invested in saving the marriage.
3. Don't be afraid of counseling
Some couples refuse to seek out help until they've actually left their spouses, and this usually isn't conducive to saving their marriages.
Don't let pride get in the way of your love life. Even if some issues can't be fixed, there are often things you can work on together. Don't wait until you're already separated or divorced to try counseling — start by talking about individual issues with your spouse in the heat of the moment when they arise. This will help prevent them from becoming full-blown fights later.
For instance, if you live in Ohio, you can look up ‘marriage counseling Columbus Ohio’ and see if there are counselors near you. It's better that you find someone who is close in case there is a need for quick sessions.
4. Be open to the possibility that your marriage still has a chance
Sometimes it's difficult to see what's right in front of you while living day to day with negative thoughts. At this point in your relationship, it's easy to feel like the only way out is divorce, but that isn't necessarily true. It's important to see the possibility that your marriage can be saved if you're both willing to work on it.
If one of you is unwilling or unable, however, it may become necessary to move forward with a divorce — but wait and see how things go before you make any rash decisions.
Why should you always try saving your marriage before divorce?
Some people are afraid of failing at trying to save their marriage themselves, so instead, they move immediately on to divorce proceedings.
But it can be difficult to tell what you're truly capable of if you've already lost hope in your relationship. Be the bigger person and fight for what you know is right – especially if there's any chance that things could still work out.
There are all kinds of reasons to fight for your marriage. The simplest one is that you deserve to be with someone who truly wants to be with you, even if there are issues or problems that need to be worked out. Don't give up just yet, fixing things will bring your love and marriage great happiness!
