There’s this misconception that guys are the ones who always want to have sex. And that women need all the coaxing and persuasion.
But that’s not necessarily the case. In fact, if you’re a woman reading this, you know perfectly well that your partner isn’t always in the mood for sex.
But that doesn’t mean sex is off the table that night. It just means you need to try one of these 9 seductive tips.
Whisper sexy little nothings
The perfect time to use this tip is when you’re out in public together, and you want to have sex later. In short, it doesn’t have to be a romantic setting. In fact, it’s better if it’s not.
Just lean in, and whisper something sexy. Be nonchalant and easy going about it. The anticipation will turn him on and give him something to anticipate.
Extra tip: “Dirty Talk: The Language of Lust – How to Talk Dirty to Your Man, Become His Sexual Obsession, Dirty Talk Your Way into His Heart & Make Your Wildest Fantasies Come True!” by Eric Monroe is a great book to start off with in case you are wondering what you could whisper in his ear.
Be intimate outside of the bedroom
Intimacy isn’t just about sex. It’s everything you do before and after, too.
So, how can you flirt with your partner to build intimacy and excitement in the hours leading up to sex? Maybe it’s fun flirting, a sincere compliment, or even sexting – if that’s your thing.
It all depends on your relationship, but just make it clear that you want to be with him.
Tease with touch
Instead of going headfirst into passionate lovemaking, why not take things slow and build up desire and intensity?
Do this by starting and stopping. Or, by lightly touching and stroking him, followed by a pause. This can make him desire you – and the sex – even more.
Extra tip: you can play a masseuse and use sensual massage oils to relax him. There's no better way to get him going!
Let him do his thing
You might be frustrated when your partner comes home, and he just sort of zones out. It’s easy to take it personally. After all, you want him to pay attention to you. Instead, he watches TV, plays video games, works out in the garage or yard, or whatever his thing is.
But instead of resisting this and harping on him, just let him do his thing. You know why? It’s how a man reduces his stress levels and replenishes his testosterone levels.
The thing is, back in prehistoric times, after men went hunting, they needed to come home and just rest. They had just used up a lot of testosterone and experienced acute stress. It’s really no different in today’s society. After a long day at work, men can be downright depleted.
So, let him veg out for a little bit. It can replenish his hormones and help him get in the mood.
Feed him like you mean it
If you want your partner to want you, make sure he eats a libido-boosting diet. Here are some top picks for your guy:
- Vitamin D-rich foods, such as tuna steaks, can significantly raise testosterone levels.
- Honey might seem like an unlikely suggestion, but if your partner has a sweet tooth, persuade him to enjoy some honey. The mineral in honey, called boron, is linked to high testosterone. Honey also contains nitric oxide, which according to nutrition consultant, Alan Gordon, “is key in opening up blood vessels that create erections.”
- Egg yolks are a precursor to testosterone, so how about a nice omelet or fried eggs for breakfast?
- Pomegranate juice, when consumed daily, can increase testosterone levels by up to 30 percent, and that can help boost his libido.
- Cruciferous veggies like broccoli, cauliflower, cabbage, kale, and Brussels sprouts, can help to flush extra estrogen from both men and women’s bodies. And removing excess estrogen from a guy’s system is a good way to make his testosterone more effective.
- Oysters are a long-time favorite libido-booster. And that’s due to their high zinc content. This one mineral can boost testosterone, libido, and sperm count. Look for zinc in foods like salmon, sardines, anchovies, cashews, and pumpkin seeds.
- Garlic might not sound (or smell) like a sexy, libido-boosting option. And while it doesn’t boost libido or raise testosterone, per se, it does help to lower the stress hormone, cortisol. And with lower cortisol levels, your body has an easier time using the testosterone it has.
Dress the part
When we talk about sex and clothes, the first thing that comes to mind might be revealing pieces that show a lot of skin. And yes, these are considered sexy. But why not hold something back and give him something to desire?
For example, wearing a loose blouse lets him imagine what’s underneath it, rather than exposing everything right off the bat. Or, tie your hair up in an elegant bun, and he just might wonder what it looks like falling down your back.
The idea is to give him plenty of opportunities to imagine and desire you.
It pays to do some clean-up in your lingerie drawer as well. Surprise your partner with some new sexy lingerie. Hustler Hollywood, a well-known high-end adult toy store, carries a great selection of lingerie for every taste.
Talk about stress
Some guys – okay, most guys – aren’t always so good at talking about their emotions and their feelings. So, after a long day at work, he might have a hard time talking about how he’s feeling. But you can still talk about stress together.
The thing is, men tend to value tasks, getting the job done, saving the day, coming up with solutions, etc.
So, focus on these things. And if he’s stressed because he’s not accomplishing what he wants to, empathize with this.
Exercise can briefly raise testosterone for anywhere from 15 minutes to an hour. So, frequent and consistent exercise – yes, even working out together – can give him a much-needed boost of this all-important hormone.
But the surest way to increase testosterone over a long period of time is with intermittent fasting and high-intensity exercise, like HIIT, or something similar.
Extra tip: Read Jimmy Moore's “The Complete Guide to Fasting: Heal Your Body Through Intermittent, Alternate-Day, and Extended Fasting” for more info on intermittent fasting.
Don’t be afraid to initiate sex
It might feel vulnerable to express your desire for sex. After all, who wants to be rejected? But when a man knows you desire him, it can really excite him and make him feel like the luckiest chap in the whole world.
Getting your partner in the mood for sex is part brain chemistry, part diet, part fitness, part strategy, and a little TLC from you. What tips do you think you’ll try to get your guy in the mood for sex?