Has it been a while since you tried to dry hump? It was probably your first introduction to sexual activity when you were still a wee thing in high school. And since then, you’ve probably moved on to penetrative sex.
But dry humping isn’t just something youngsters do. Dry humping works because it feels good. And it might be something you want to try it with your current partner, even if the school hallways are a bit historic.
What is dry humping?
Dry humping is a sexual act, but it’s non-penetrative sex, and therefore, dry sex. This means that there’s pressure, friction, and grazing with both partner’s private parts, but the clothes stay on, especially down there.
Another reason why dry humping is called dry sex is that you don’t exchange bodily fluids.
Why is dry humping a good idea?
Intimacy without penetration
There are several reasons why dry humping has its advantages. For one thing, if you and your partner are still getting to know each other, you might not want to head straight to penetrative sex. But you still might want to get close and intimate on some level.
Dry humping can be a good midway point. As Huffington Post writer, Toni Nagy, says, dry humping “honors the involvedness of sex, giving you time to actually sort out how you both feel about each other, but still leaves something to build up to.”
Sex without the risk for pregnancy
Technically, and if done safely, dry humping is a good alternative to having sex – especially when you’re trying to avoid pregnancy. That’s because pregnancy occurs when the male sperm enters the vagina, moves up to the uterus, and joins with the female egg.
However, if no bodily fluids come into contact, which is usually the case with dry humping, the chance of pregnancy is basically zero.
Something new
Dry humping is great for people who are just getting to know each other, as Nagy suggested. But it’s also something exciting to try with your long-term partner.
When sex gets boring and routine, it’s always a good idea to switch things up and try something new. And even if dry humping is a blast from the past, it can still be intimate for both you and your current partner.
Is dry humping more satisfying for women?
Even though penetrative sex is the standard, it’s actually more stimulating for the man than for the woman. In order for a woman to orgasm, clitoral stimulation is key.
And the rubbing and pressure that comes with dry humping can be very stimulating for a woman – yes, even without penetration.
But don’t worry, it’s fun for the guys, too. It can take the pressure off of them to meet many of the sex standards which both society and other men hold them up to.
How to dry hump safely
When you dry hump, there are some things to keep in mind so that it’s comfortable, painless and also safe.
- Be aware of snaps, buckles, buttons, and zippers. With all that rubbing, pressing, and grinding, these can irritate skin and potentially damage it.
- You can still wear condoms to help prevent the spread of STIs.
- Even though your genitals remain covered during dry humping, it can be helpful to apply lubricant. This helps prevent irritation from all the friction.
- Avoid aggressive dry humping to prevent tears in the vaginal area. Not only do tears hurt, but they can also make you more susceptible to infections down there.
How to make dry humping fun
Stay in the present moment
It’s easy to double-think things, to second-guess yourself and to wonder if you’re doing it right. And that’s just you. Then, you start to wonder if your partner is having a good time, too.
All of these thoughts take you out of the present moment and essentially make dry humping a lot less enjoyable and a lot more stressful.
So, just focus on the present moment and commit to what you’re doing. This will intensify the intimate time you share with your partner.
Wear comfortable clothes
If jeans are too rough and zippers are causing too much friction against your delicate private parts, trade them in for soft cotton shorts, or cozy sweatpants. Your partner can do the same. And without the coarse material standing in the way, there’s a good chance that you’ll be able to climax easier.
Tap into your desires
What do you want to feel? What feels good? Once you find the right position, the right movement and just the right amount of pressure, don’t be afraid to recreate it and communicate that.
And don’t be afraid to tell your partner what works and what doesn’t. After all, you both want the other person to feel good, and communication is the best way to get there.
Make it interesting with sensual oils
Why not combine dry humping with a sensual massage session? The end goal is just to increase intimacy in your relationship and what's better for that than feeling each other's body thoroughly.
Make your dry humping session more interesting by incorporating sensual massage oils. You can take turns in massaging and make it a fun evening!
To take things even further, create a romantic ambiance with scented candles.
Hands are welcome
Even though clothes stay on and the genitals stay cover, that doesn’t mean you can’t touch and stroke with hands and fingers. There’s really no one-size-fits-all approach. What you do and how you do it all depends on you and your partner.
So, communication is key. But so is being brave and trying.
Use your whole body
The focus of dry humping is the genital area. But you can use your entire body, and so can your partner. So, if it feels good to press against his leg or to use your hands, feel free. In short, don’t limit yourself.
Take it to the couch
There’s something exciting about taking your intimate moments outside of the bedroom. So, why not take your next dry humping session to the couch. Get cozy with a blanket, light a candle and just enjoy the sensations you and your partner create together.
These are just a handful of ways you can start to dry hump with your partner. Even though it’s not penetrative sex, it can still be stimulating, exciting and deeply satisfying.
